Listening to: This is the end, the doors.
Reading: Penny Dreadful.

I know it has been a long time since i have shown any movement on this site at all... im feeling quite numb.

Artistically i am doing much less than what i want, so little in fact that im beginning to feel like im slipping out of the clouds of artistic beauty and sinking into the tar of the corporate world.

in the past year or so i have established my own life. I have moved out of home, i have got a well paying job that is something i never wanted to do, but i do it to supposedly support what i love, my art. Instead it goes on rent, food, cigarettes and phone bills. then its gone. the working life is sucking the life out of me. i am becoming a pleb, a robot who is too tired to do anything, who is so mentally frozen. its KILLING me. but i endure it with the optimistic view that it might change soon. and i know it will. i hope it will.

This kind of thing should be fuelling my art, it should be inspiring me to regurgitate everything i hate up onto the canvas, a digusting, revolting sight but its my inside out, its my feelings, my hopes, my failures, my opinions... my art. Thats art.

Sometimes you have to look at the glass as being half empty, to appreciate it when you feel full again.